cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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