At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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