i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
