I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
