DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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