just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
