he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
