yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
