No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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