What a fucking waste of an outfit
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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