you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
