and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
