what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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