shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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