Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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