Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
