She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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