Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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