He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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