I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
