I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
