i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
