i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Randomize
