what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
