SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
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