I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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