i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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