I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
