It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
try to milk me bitch
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