Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Randomize
