Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Randomize
