if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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