This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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