that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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