Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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