Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
