It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
