More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
