I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
