am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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