The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
