we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We had sex on a dog bed..
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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