youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Randomize