i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
