omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
you traded sex for a burrito?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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