I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'm getting married
To pizza
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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