My room smells like vodka and shame
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
did you just send me my own nude
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
