And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
