I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
