wat bout pragnant strippers??
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
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